has your child been subjected to halloween hallucinations?

watch out, parents! with halloween just two days ago, countless children will fall victim to illegal-substances-or-items-hidden-in-candy-by-evil-people-related-illnesses. this may be found in, but is not limited to: candies such as twix, starbursts, fun dips, organic/non-gmo gummy bears, snickers, skittles, m&ms (peanut excluded), old bags of chips that old people throw in the bowl after they run out of candy, and anything purchased from target. an anonymous mother submitted these horrifying images saturday night after her children returned from trick-or-treating. a dangerous substance was maliciously hidden in her daughter's rolo. 

the mother in question had smartly trained her children on how to thoroughly examine all of their halloween candy to prevent this when the time came-- and her three-year-old daughter put those skills to the test when she discovered this and presented it to her parents. "my husband and i never would've been able to catch that if she hadn't used her tiny little micro genius brain to find that object! it was so well hidden, it definitely could've hurt her severely", the mom wrote to us. other instances have been reported in safe american neighborhoods of drugs being added to children's candy as well. drug dealers, who depend on the importation and sale of their elicit substances to various types of people for their main income, hide their products in their candy on halloween night in order to fulfill their little satanic fantasies and mess with elementary schoolers. if you ever find something foreign in your child's candy, make sure to contact your local reactionary neighborhood facebook group immediately.